The J Word NZ

Instruction #14

When it is our time to leave this earth, two of the most important things we leave behind are our shared knowledge and the way we made other people feel.

Being a person with a very low level of patience has seen me struggle with teaching, spending time articulating, and explaining my knowledge to others. I have to very mindfully slow myself down when I am trying to explain something so that I do not start to feel frustrated myself or make the person I am sharing knowledge with, feel small. As a child, I often felt small, not heard, not seen and not worthy. This is a mindset I have carried through to adulthood and have only recently started to shed. As usual, though, the way you are taught is the practice you generally adopt yourself.

As a mother, this learned method of communicating knowledge has been especially difficult to live with. My low level of patience has seen me say and do things that make me feel extremely embarrassed about my own behaviour, guilty after the words have been released and in general not good enough as a parent. Even though I knew I did not want to parent in an abrupt way it continued on for a long time. I didn’t know how to change it, how to react differently and I didn’t know how to stop.

Thankfully, I managed to learn a lot of great tools through books such as Nigel Latta’s The politically incorrect guide to parenting, seeking talk therapy for myself and undertaking a lot of communication research. I am by no means perfect but I have this a lot more under control now than I used to. That’s progress.

Another thing to remember is that we all share our knowledge differently. I have discovered personally that I like to share my knowledge through writing. I like to pen my experiences. make sense of them and publish them for others to read and ponder. I also love to read other people’s experiences, pluck the seeds of wisdom from their words and practice them in areas of my own life.

Share your knowledge, it’s a great way to achieve immortality.

J

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